I am beginning to train for my second half marathon this week. I initially ran to have something to do actively with my amazing and athletic husband. When we were training on treadmills, it was easy to run together – side by side. When we hit the pavement, his pace is at least four minutes faster per mile than mine, so it became a much more solitary activity. I really struggled with it at that point. I never really found the zen of running that others value and enjoy. But I treated it as a chore, not as who I am. In any other activity or hobby I embark on, the inner learner in me rears her gorgeous head and I dive into all the information I can find – determined to get better and better.
Now I know that I need to find my inner fire, the piece of me that is already a runner. Stop hiding behind not being a real runner even when I was an athlete in high school (I high jumped and often shirked my running workouts whenever possible). People who aren’t runners don’t run – at least not on purpose. So she’s in me, waiting for me to discover her. It’s time.